Every family and household is different. And every kid is different. I have heard the story of the kid who really REALLY wanted a (fill in the blank), only to have the parent left with all the responsibilities years later. And I have also had clients in the room where the 8 or 9 year old was clearly in control of the situation, and the parent just shrugs and says, “She knows all about this! She did all the research and does all the work!”
That is to say, some kids are going to be amazing pet owners and do a lot of work. Others will lose interest quickly. If that’s a pet that requires a lot of attention and work, then this is not fair for anyone, especially the pet.
What to avoid:
Right off the bat, I generally avoid the pet everyone thinks they should get for their kid. A hamster. While I have known some wonderful hamsters, most are jumpy and nervous, resent handling, and would like to just sleep during the day, thank you very much, as that’s their wiring. I think hamsters are more appropriate for adults who will understand when to leave the hamster alone and are patient with this animal’s lifestyle.
That aside, unless you as a parent are 1000 percent prepared to take over ALL the work when your kid gets bored (in case your kid gets bored), then don’t get a long-lived complicated pet. Tortoises can live 60+ years. Chinchillas can live 20 years. Even a parakeet can live into its teens.
Some reptiles require a lot of expensive equipment and then upkeep. A little aquatic turtle requires special heat, lighting, filtration systems, water changes, and then the really huge tank when he outgrows his little tank. Ready for a 60 or 100 gallon tank in your living room? Some of my clients were. Some weren’t.
And then there are the bills. All pets can require medical or surgical care at some point. This should be a given. You never know. A rat can live 2-3 years, but might need a lump removed or respiratory infection treated. What’s the budget?
What to look for:
Well, first, look for what your kid is likely to be able to handle. A child who willing reads up, does research, asks to talk to a vet about the pet they're interested in, likely has what it takes to stick with it. A kid who sees an animal and then wants it needs to learn about responsibility and the work involved. Not my department, that’s for the parents to sort out.
In a pet, again, think what type of time commitment (daily and then how many years) you are ready for. Find reliable sources online (see my references for various exotics organizations on the home page).
Ask the family do they want a pet they can hold? Cuddle? Watch? My mom’s neighbor got in touch with me because her three kids all wanted birds for Christmas. My first thought was AAAAAAAaaaaahhhhh! But then I heard what she had to say. They had all agreed that they should not have birds they were going to hold and get out of the cage, because they have cats. They all agreed they wanted birds that weren’t overly loud. And mom knows she’ll likely end up with at least part of the work. They settled on finches. PERFECT!
Sometimes there are silver linings...
You might not think it now, but maybe when your kid loses interest in 5 days and you are stuck with all the work…you might fall in love. I have countless clients who tell me “this was my [daughter’s/son’s/niece’s] pet when [he/she/she] was young, but somehow I ended up with her”… while the owner is clutching the pet to their chest and wanting all the best medical care. 30 year old tortoises. 10 year old snakes. 15 year old parrots. A love affair bloomed by accident.
My favorite story is about a woman who bought a Grow a Frog for her kids. This is an educational kit where you buy the small tank, and then send for the tadpole. The little swimmer shows up in the mail, and then the kids watch it grow into a small frog. Mom thought they’d have the frog for a year or two. And then the kids went off to high school. And then away to college. Then graduate school. Then got married. I met Willy when he was 27 years old. He had featured in local papers because neighbor kids would come over to see the long-lived frog. Mom loved this frog and did everything to keep him healthy and happy. She laughs…who knew?
So, no surprise – do your research.
There’s no way around it. Do lots of research. Make no impulse buys. If you’re getting a rabbit or guinea pig or even chinchilla, look to rescues. If you’re getting any pet, look to rescues, but some may be hard to find that way. Read up. Find a vet who you can talk to in advance. Know what diseases they MIGHT get. Estimate initial and then long-term expenses. Then ask yourself…will I also want this pet, because in the end, as the adult, that counts for a lot too.